The odds against an all-white squirrel being born are 100,000 to one and he may never have been discovered if a football had not hit his tree.

But a passer-by picked him up in Carlton Grove, Peckham, and took him to the London Wildcare Centre in Wallington, Surrey, where staff have named him Persil. Director Ted Burden said: "Persil is a very happy chap."

The sadly deluded reverend Bundy shouldn't be taken in by Persil's honkie exterior and reddened eyes. Neither should one read too much into Skwerlhugger Burden's statement that "Persil is a very happy chap."

Persil is nothing more than a albino variation of the common gray squirrel. Moreover, being "very happy" is hardly synonymous with being nice. Skwerl Persil is undoubtedly overjoyed at infiltrating the London Wildcare Centre, living on the dole and spreading the false promises of squirrel world domination.