But it would get pretty excited about the chance of being paid £4m a year to tell $tevie Mbe he's useless a few times a year. So it's no surprise that Grooverider, the son and Mr 15% of Bo' Selecta's Fabio Capello, has been telling Lah'n's Lah'n E'h'nin Stannah how much his dear old dad loves England.

Neri's first job may well be to train Capello on how best to deliver a big boot up Frank Lampard's behind. Capello's a big fan of holding midfielders, see, which would mean no place for Lampard in the team. Not that the cuddly midfielder sounds too worried. "It is a job which needs a big personality and Capello certainly is that," he said. "Maybe he is the kind of manager who can take us forward." If you can call a place on the bench a step forward.