HOW many psychics does it take to change a lightbulb? Just the one . . . but they need the help of a dead relative whose first name begins with the letter J.

We can all have a laugh at so-called mediums, but from where I’m sitting they fall into one of two categories.

They either truly believe themselves to be gifted, in which case I file them under “self-deluding nutters” or they’re the very worst kind . . . the nasty, manipulative, money-grabbing leeches who prey on vulnerable people.

Thankfully, the Government is at last waking up to the damage these charlatans can do and is in the process of introducing some form of regulation.

It plans to repeal the Fraudulent Mediums Act — are there any other kind? — which, co-incidentally, replaced the 1735 Witchcraft Act.

And, if approved by Parliament, new consumer protection laws will pave the way for disgruntled customers to sue psychics who fail to deliver the promise of good fortune, health or everlasting love.